Once in a while i stopped looking at others and start gazing my self. In one point it looks to me that do i know what i am doing. What am i doing at present. Just going to a place of work being engaged in work for nearly 12 hours a day and it's carried stressed on to life of oneself. What is a waste of time and effort and most of all energy and focus just for daily expenses and nothing more. Because are you finding any meaning for it. It's like a caged pig going slaughter house each day getting into pieces everyday and some how getting integrated and continuing on for the very next day.
If i loose my 95% energetic life for struggling earning bread and butter, with out any guarantee that will it be able continue the very next moment.Then what life i am living with out pondering on myself and the creation and the mystery around it.
It is not sustainable at all if my consciousness is growing. I can't be a slaved IT dog on a daily basis who is unleashed buy his masters task and grounded by the routines of daily job for 90% of the time on each day. But my mind is not free till now it has fear and hope with its as factors so i am not clear what to do/don't nor why to do/don't. Running after sexual pleasure, monetary pleasure and social ennoblement and the dreams of it still hanging around to contain me within the cage of imprisonment.
Repulsion from consequences and its accomplices are shaping my actions. As till now i have no clarity and understanding and freedom inside me.
Only thing that i can see is that whatever i can be aware of it facilitating me to see me more and giving clarity that is leading to understanding of this grandeur complex design and structure and also that is Nirvana. Life, Death, Freedom and Love and Intelligence goes together at one go.
I am just keeping myself to minimum and trying on one thing and one thing only that i should do i.e. understanding what is going on in short trying to figure out myself and creation.
| Being at presence of the sea for endless celestial feeling |
It is not sustainable at all if my consciousness is growing. I can't be a slaved IT dog on a daily basis who is unleashed buy his masters task and grounded by the routines of daily job for 90% of the time on each day. But my mind is not free till now it has fear and hope with its as factors so i am not clear what to do/don't nor why to do/don't. Running after sexual pleasure, monetary pleasure and social ennoblement and the dreams of it still hanging around to contain me within the cage of imprisonment.
Repulsion from consequences and its accomplices are shaping my actions. As till now i have no clarity and understanding and freedom inside me.
Only thing that i can see is that whatever i can be aware of it facilitating me to see me more and giving clarity that is leading to understanding of this grandeur complex design and structure and also that is Nirvana. Life, Death, Freedom and Love and Intelligence goes together at one go.
I am just keeping myself to minimum and trying on one thing and one thing only that i should do i.e. understanding what is going on in short trying to figure out myself and creation.
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